My Very Dear Sarah:

The  indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days--perhaps tomorrow. Lest I should not be able to write again, I feel  impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I shall be no more. 

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt, or falter. I know how strongly American Civilization now leans on the triumph of the Government, and how great a debt we owe to those who went on before us through the blood and sufferings of the Revolution, And I am willing-- perfectly willing-- to lay down my joys in this life, to help maintain this Government, and to pay that debt. 

Sarah my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but Omnipotence could break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly with all these chains to the battle field. 

The memories of the blissful moments I have spent with you come creeping over me, and I feel most gratified to God and you that I have enjoyed them so long. And how hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes of future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and seen our sons grown up to honorable manhood, around us.  

I have, I know, but few small claims upon Divine Providence, but something whispers to me--perhaps it is the wafted prayer of my little Edgar, that I shall return to my loved ones unharmed.  If I do not my dear Sarah, never forget how much I love you, and when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name.  Forgive my many faults, and the pains I have caused you.  How thoughtless and foolish I have often times been!  How gladly would I wash out with my tears every little spot upon your happiness... 

But, O Sarah, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you: in the gladdest days and the darkest nights...always, always, and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath, as the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.  Sarah, do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again. 


Major Sullivan Ballou's  letter to his wife Sarah seven days before being killed at the first battle of Bull Run, the first major battle of the Civil War fought in Virginia, near the Manassas, Virginia railway junction on July 21, 1861. The Federals lost about 3,000 casualties (killed, wounded, and captured or missing), and the Confederates suffered about 2,000.


Background set by:

Civil War Flags by:

Music is Civil War era song Aura Lee which
 you may know by the title of Love Me Tender by Elvis Presley